i'm posting this here because my boyfriend don't wanna be laughed at by his brother.

and oh, btw, it's spells C-A-W-I ♥

Morphine and Alcohol

You're like a morphine and alcohol

Every time we're together, you get so addicting.
You've reached my threshold.
And while we're getting this relationship longer,
My tolerance level gets higher.
But when you're gone
especially when there's no tapering done,
I get these withdrawal syndrome.
I can't eat, I get restless, I can't sleep

So please...
Don't go...
It doesn't matter if I reach the toxicity level,
You'll always be in my system.

mura kag tambal ug alcohol


kada mag-uban ta, makaadik ka.
naabot nako akong threshold.
ug samtang nagadugay ta, nagataas na akong tolerance sa imo.
pero kung mawala ka,
samot nag wala gihinay-hinay,
makatilaw man pod kog withdrawal syndrome.
di ko kakaon, di ko mahimutang, di ko katulog


maong hinaot nako ayaw nalang hawa.
bahalag maabot kog toxicity level,
naa ra gihapon ka sa akong sistema.

little letters ♥♥♥

mamine's camera-phobic.
y u owez spoil the picture?

i drew this last night. nuthin' to do. :)

Dear Mine,

HAPPY MONTHSARY!!!! I am so glad we made it this far. I know you have given me heart aches. But there are more laughter and sweetness we shared that made me forget about our troubles. I have no regrets having you in my life... 10 more months and we'll be happier :D I've never been happier. I love you, mine! I pray to HIM, despite of our differences, we can always make it through the obstacles. I know you don't want me to mind what other people may say about us. I know, because you want me to focus on us. It's our love, our world, ours alone. You made me happy. Let's be happy. Always! ♥

Dear Janely,

You are my friend virtually and IRL. I was kinda browsing your tumblr page. I'm glad you include me in your Best people in tumblr list. I'm flattered. I love you! BTW, you're already in my list for the sweetest couple I know IRL. There are already about 5 of you. I'm planning to make a page about that :D Keep updated. I always love your blog. Keep it up! ♥

Dear Someone-I'm-Starting-To-Hate-Now,

I don't know what happened, but you're not taking EXTRA careful of that pricey cam. That's a legacy. You should take care of it. When I checked it this afternoon, it's not in good shape. I hope it is still functioning. I thought you have this ability to take care of the things turned over to you. Please do before I totally hate you. Thanks :D


~xoxo,
dowbee! ♥

daily letter (day 9)

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

There are lots of people I wanna meet. But to become realistic, I will write a letter to 2 or so people I wanna see alive before I die.

Dear long lost Daddy,

You know why I wanna meet you right?

Dear Trissey,

You don't know me, but I love your fashion sense and I've been following your blogs (here and here). I also like your tandem. You look good together and I hope you're nice when I see you. I just want to have a picture or two with you.

Dear Cawi's crush,

You are incomparable. And I guess he is right that you are waaay too much for him. I don't know why. I admit I become jealous every time he mentions your name and how he expresses sweet sighs in front of me. I know you're cool and hopefully kind enough to disregard my rude remarks. Anyhoo, I still wanna meet you and become good friends. But having you as a friend might be bad idea so i think we're better off this way-- anonymous to each other. I follow your blog and makes me like you more. 

See you around,

angel :)

daily letter (day 8)

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Dear favorite internet friend,

I can't think of any person whom I can consider as my favorite internet friend, but you are the one boosting me up in Plurk. 

To Janely, 

Thanks for the insights you shared in your blogs. I am always amazed with the way you write. You are witty, straightforward and cruelly honest *now, don't hit me :)*

To my tumblr friends who followed me,

Thank you for making me feel overwhelmed. I know we share the same ideas and emotions. Thanks for reblogging my posts though it wasn't my work. But I know you reblogged it because we feel the same way. We adore cute stuffs, we are in love, we are hurt, we are simply happy. Just by following me, you make me feel I exist in the cyber world.

cyber hugs and kisses,

alegnaxc

daily letter (day 6)

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Dear stranger,

How is life going? I hope it isn't that cruel than I imagined. I hope it will be good to you somehow. Have you  eaten yet? Did you sleep well last night? It was pretty cold today because of the rain. I hope you got a shelter. By the way, how's your family? I hope they're fine. I hope thinking about you, too, as much as you're thinking about them. Have you taken your shower? I know this is silly but seriously, some people don't take a bath especially when it's cold in the morning. By the way, we haven't met. And I don't know who you are. I hope I can ask the same questions when I get to know you.

nice writing a letter to you,

angel in disguise :D

daily letter (day 5)

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Dear Dreams,

You sometimes scare me at night making me wish I don't wanna go back to sleep again. But then I need you to free myself from fears I imagined in the real world. There are times that you make me hungry making me wish you are for real. And there are times that you make me "kilig" especially when Hollywood celebrities visit me and my Cawi snuggle me making me wish I could sleep forever with a dream like that. 

But my dear dream, you know how much I wanted to become my dream role in society. I know this sounds silly, but I really wanted to become a CELEBRITY! I wanna hang-out with the public figures, getting sponsors from and/

or become one of the model of 

 famous clothing lines, receive projects and getting paid for my talent, endorse products, being taken care of the prominent stylists and dermatologists. And then, I can help, not only to my family, but also to those poverty-stricken people.

I know this sounds too much. But there's no harm in dreaming, right? It's just a dream. But there is still a 50-50 chance that this might come true. Yes, it does. Because Cawi was once a dream before we met. He came into reality and I love him and still loving him because he's for real.

Oh well, I guess I'll just have to keep on dreaming.

Goodnight,

Angel

daily letter (day 4)

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Dear Oliver,

You have grown up now. Grown up, I mean you're taller than me. I know we 're not close as siblings, but I promised myself that once I have a stable job, I'll help you with your studies. Please stay close with Mama and please don't give her a hard time because she already does with me. I may not be the best Ate you have, but I'll try my best to give you what you need in the future. Please don't hesitate to be close to me. I know sometimes you become annoying in text but I'm not being mean to you, am I not? Anyway, you are the only brother I have. Please do good in school. Keep away from bad influences and make your mama proud. :)

Dear cousins,

We may not be related by blood, but you know for sure that you are more than a real brother/sister to me. Thank you for keeping my secret about me having boyfriends since high school. Thank you for helping me figure out what needs to be figured out. Thank you for your patience though I have been the most annoying Ate you have. Thank you for your understanding when I'm not in my common senses. Thank you for appreciating the food I cook. And thank you for making me part of your life. I hope this will not end even though I'll get married. I love the laughters on random times and for your silence when I whine about heart breaks. You really know what I need. Let's support each other even when our hair turns to gray...

xoxo,

Ate Angel

daily letter (day 3)

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

i wasn't able to write the 3rd day letter yesterday because i was out-of-town and i'm lamenting on the fact that my beau will be going home to their province today so i decided to write it now. So here it goes

Dear  Biological Parents,

I love you, because if it wasn't for your mistake, I wouldn't be here! And I love my life now.

To my Dad who left us for almost 22 years now (yes, almost 22 years because he left my mom while she's carrying me in her tummy. Or is it the other way around, I don't know), I've always, ALWAYS, wanted to see you in person. I want to see your face if we have something in common. I wanted to hug you. I wanted to ask you many questions. I wanted to know you. I wanted to experience how a Dad like your age makes their daughter happy. 

And to my Mom who worked her ass off just to send money for me. Even though you have another family and considered my to be part of it, thank you. Although, there are times that I've been pressuring you for some financial matters, I know you're trying your best to give me what you can. I can feel that there are times that you get tired of how I've been telling you to do this and that. I know that doesn't much of a good daughter, right. But mother dear, don't worry. I've been doing everything I could for you to call me I'm your daughter. And I'm trying not to waste your efforts that you have been worked on. I love you.

Dear Foster Parents,

I lived my life for 21 years minus one week with you. You have seen me grown. You taught me good things from bad. I know I have not been the perfect daughter you thought I would, but you see, I've done good even though it's not good enough. I'm sorry for being so stubborn and not following all what you want me to do. I just want to be happy as what you wanted me to be. I understand all your nagging. It were all for my benefit. All I need is your understanding and support for all the things I do and about to do. Utang ko sa inyo ang buhay ko. You gave me almost everything I need. The things that aren't things like love, care, and safety. Things that are things are bonuses. I love you more than life.