don't take it seriously

Err, okay. I changed my relationship status from "in a relationship" to "engaged" with whoever my guys is. My Tita would always react on my relationship status. I dunno how she could actually think that I'm really engaged? Please, please, please... I dunno what to think about her. But as of now, I think this will serve as something to annoy her. I hope she'll get open-minded when it comes to this stuff.

*And does she really think that my guy is not good enough for me?*

I HATE YOU DEAN'S SECRETARY!!!!

I HATE YOU TO DEATH!!!! YOU ARE THE REASON WHY I ALMOST BROKE UP WITH MY BEAU AND THE SOLE REASON WHY WE DIDN'T GET THE CHANCE TO CELEBRATE OUR 3RD ANNIVERSARY TODAY!!!!!
FUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOU!!!!!
and oh...

GHED IM SO ANGRY!!!!

daily letter (day 12)

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Dear someone who hurt me,

i forgot what's the reason why you hurt me... i just hope that i have been healed long time ago. and i just hope you didn't leave scars in my heart. mmmkay... that's all! buh-bye!

~angel

daily letter (day 10)

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Dear Ex-friend,

It was summer 2 years ago when we became classmates and eventually became a very good and close friends. You have been so nice and kind to me. You have that captivating face and friendly aura that makes other girls fall for you. We were close for a week that we were almost inseparable. We shared secrets and experiences in love and we even have a secret handshake. And you know what? I think you purposely made every girl in our room fall for you. What a sneaky hidden agenda. I'm just happy that my boyfriend loves me so much that I can't let go of him, I didn't fall for your rubbish scheme.

But tell me, what really happened? I was waiting for you to talk to me first. But there's no more chance anymore. And I'm not hoping to be friends with you again. Thanks for the time before.

angel

daily letter (day 7)

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Dear Ex-boyfriends,

I'm glad that you still remember me. But isn't it too bothersome to add me in Facebook? What is that suppose to mean? I mentioned you in my first letter, didn't I? Oh well, I don't like to bother you. I don't want to sound bitter but I want to delete you as a friend in my account. I have nothing to do with you and I don't want to reconnect with you anymore. Except for Kit, who became a good friend to me when I started college. Thank you for the friendship though you've been an asshole before for leaving me unaware. I think we're better off this way.

I hope you do good in your lives. And please stop pestering me by boasting how you do good with your current girlfriends. I don't care. 

>_________<,

doby :P

really?

accusing somebody is bad. really bad. especially when it's only your instinct who tells you who did it. what the fuck happened to old geezers like you to accuse your son stealing a gold ring from you? we don't have any proof that he really did it. we know he's broke but that doesn't mean he can steal anything from you. are you desperate because you can't think of anyone who you can possibly do it? how the fuck would he do it? just because he came close to the shelf where you suppose to put your golden fucking ring, it doesn't mean he stole it. and you really mean STEALING. and now confronting him is something i think is worse. it doesn't really make sense. what if you found your fucking ring somewhere? what would you do? it would be a slap on your face for accusing somebody who did not really do it.you have no idea how one feels being accused for something he did not do.

I thought I could curse my course... but nevermind

It's so frustrating to see how we suffered from financial instability. And no matter how noble my course is; and no matter how high my future employees would pay me in my future job, I still feel helpless. I can't stand hearing them complaining where did our monthly allowance go. Receiving roughly 20K per month with 2-5 persons in this household isn't enough. For my lola alone, we have to spend for her check-ups, pricey medications and laboratory tests, and for us, the groceries and other miscellaneous. These are crucial things. And it's becoming more difficult now that we pawned most of our jewelries and they are pending to be redeemed or renewed this month. Plus me, I have to prepare for a costly printings on my exhibit forms as I UN-enthusiastically prepare for the upcoming review for our PNL Exam on December. At one moment, I feel like I really want to give up. 'Cause if I could, I would have just stop pursuing this rubbish preparations and get myself a job. I want to earn and then enroll myself in a course that I've been dying to take when I was in high school. It is my frustration now. But then I always end up blaming myself for being too obedient to them that I gave up my dream and my brilliant plan (that's what I thought before). Nevertheless, I also blame them for setting such high expectations even I couldn't imagine if I can make it. I suck at making decisions for myself, that's why they just boss me around, dictating me to do this and that. They even want to rule my own happiness. I mean, kulang nalang sila ang maghahanap ng mapapangasawa ko. I don't want that to happen. I'm so happy with my partner now.And so, now that I'm unemployed, unhappy with what's happening in our lives, and almost in the verge of giving up, how can they patch it up and make me happy again? [minus the lovelife. I'm in charge with my lovelife]. I can't just live with their promises that being a nurse (someday) would make me happy. Do you think that filling up a patient's chart, preparing meds, and doing nursing procedure makes me the happiest person on earth? I may be satisfied, but not happy. I could give them a happy and wealthy life without making myself suffer. *i think i just stabbed myself* *dropsdead*

I want Mass Communication. If only I had taken it before, I don't have to do loads of typing stuff, chasing clinical instructors, queuing in offices, traveling to provincial hospital just for an effin' signature and when you get back in the city, you realized you put the dot (.) in wrong places and have it edited and reprinted, then getting reprimands from the dean. In Mass Comm., after graduating, all you have to do is prepare to claim your transcript of records and authenticated diploma, prepare loads of resume and GET A JOB!!!!

*SLAPS MYSELF*

i have a secret

And it's not a secret anymore.

Sometimes I really wish I am insane right now. I particularly needed the disorder of an anorexic.

Yes, friends... I wanna be anorexic.

And I want it to happen right now.

 photo from here

I've been worrying on how I am gaining weight every day. I'm planning on a diet but it doesn't work cuz my lola cooks so good it's hard for me to resist to want more. When in school, I can't maintain the diet because I think I'm too stressed out to eat less. I've been wondering why some people who gobble large piles of food than mine still remain their figure? I know it's because how fast their metabolisms work, but why not mine? Why can't my metabolism work as normal as theirs?

I envy those girls who can wear any dress and fits them just right. My friends/classmates where sort of chubby but their boobs looks larger than their tummies which gave them a slender look.

During lunchtime just this afternoon, I was thinking to hate the food so as not to eat it. But it's a sin to hate food. So I ate it instead *silly me*.

SO here's the plan:
a. Be anorexic and go for the desired waistline and weight.
b. After reaching the goal, go eat lots of fruits for maintenance. and oh, don't forget the veggies. *yech*

AUGH! THIS IS SO PATHETIC!!!

Another option: slimming capsules. and enroll myself to aerobics class. *pricey*

a little hate letter to the royal b*tchy-ness

Dear Royal B*tch,

I guess it's enough to say that being b*tch is likewise being dumb. You think you're so perfect. You think you're too above others. You're so full of yourself. Stop making that stolen shot a big deal. Besides I already warned you that I'll get even with you and post something worse than what you posted the last time. You just laughed at it and did not take it seriously. Well, I'm sorry if you're that dumb that you didn't see the signs coming. You see, I have the (Clarion's) camera most of the time and I can get the ugliest mug shot of your face. You should not get mad cause right now we're even. I don't really care about the rantings I received from you. If you say I'm mean, you should've known before. I already gave you the simplest condition to delete your so-called "ghastly photos". You didn't do it, therefore i won't either. That's being fair, right? You're too conscious about what other people would say to you on that photo when they've been already talking about you worse than the comments you receive. Don't you like that? You are being loved *sarcastic smile*

Remember this, if you can't accept what you are in a stolen shot photo, therefore, you don't like yourself as well. In portraits, what you're showing in the camera is not what you really are. If I got a stolen shot pic, I have to deal with it and remember that it's me. So for you, Royal B*tchiness, DEAL WITH IT! I have no plan of deleting your mug shot unless you do what I told you *evil grin*. You know it's so simple. So don't be dumb, you dumb b*tch!

little letters for the bunch of users

I'm making this post out of impulse and disappointment. After days and more days of pressure for compiling my certificates of attendance and appreciation for several  seminars I had attended in and out of school, I received an unfair share of reward.

Dear guy who got it all:

Congratulations! (*flashing a sarcastic smile*)
Tell me I'm being too self-absorbed or too selfish, but I was the one who made most of the efforts to give you certifications you needed for you to have that piece of scented paper and a junked medal. In fact you barely knew what were those stuff I contributed until I told you one day. But I'm not holding any grudges to you now.

Dear Sir who inconsistently-supporting-personnel-who-boasts-his-name-on-a-mere-green-plastic-board,

I don't think you deserve to be the head of that department when you don't know how to define CLEAR MECHANICS and not even supporting us with our needs. Hey! we're students too. I wonder why you came back to being an arrogant sloth.

Dear Ma'am-I-should-have-been-selfish-not-to-share-my-certifications-with-you,

I guess it's my fault after all because I thought I could help your "son". And indeed, i just did help him. Boohoo to me :(( Just because you're his mom and you have one of the highest ranked job in this school, it doesn't mean you have to do everything, even delegating the things to me that your "son" is suppose to do.

Dear disappointment,

nakarami kana ngayong araw ha. I've had enough of you. If only you were concrete, I would have mocked you.

Dear users,

stop using people... they're not things.


still grudging on you until tomorrow,

doby >:[

oh, forget it!

forget what i said about perfect relationship has flaws. i kinda agree to that but not this time.
just before i officially ended my day in the outside world, he's just too kind to ruin it! GED!

little letters (before the class begins tomorrow)

some things need to be anticipated
(click colorful crayons for the source)

dear blog,

i miss you... ♥


dear Cawi,

I miss you a lot... swear!


dear EIC,

i will make my tasks tomorrow. and hopefully, i will finish it before the day ends. ☺


dear chito,

as your senior managing editor, i hope i have the impetus to teach you the fundamentals of my job. i guess you already know what to do and how to do it. because i know you have the potential to be in this position... good luck!


dear group 56,

tomorrow might change our group number but still, i will coin our group as the 56th in the school. this is so far the geekiest group i've ever been. i had fun! hope to expect more from us.


dear group 10 & 16 (when i was in 3rd year college)

you were the BEST group i've ever been. sad to say, we can't be together next time. this is the last sem we'll have. best of luck to you guys!


dear ninong (boboy),

thanks for the cellphone! i like it! it would've been best if i could use the internet (wap). i guess i have to wait till i get there (USA) to fully use the features of my phone. but who knows, i will have new phone like iPhone or the like.


dear homewrecker,

YOU ARE SUCH A B*TCH! Go to hell and eat a*s! I can't believe you have the face to show in front of us. (may gana ka pang magmano sa lola ko, 'lang 'ya ka talaga!). if i could, bubuhusan talaga kita ng arinola, puno ng ihi... hahaha *LOL* Ged! you're also a parasite sucking money from a man who has a family already. GRRR! it makes me sooooo irate. SALOT KA TALAGA SA LIPUNAN!


dear Cawi (again),

thanks for everything we shared... the time, the food, the pillows, the hugs and kisses, the full moon, the thoughts, the secrets, the ice, the music, the walks, the chats, the smiles, the pimples and white heads *lol*, the laughters, the arcade and the excitement it brings... and ALL.


dear supervisor/s,

i just hope i could have a good supervisor-student relationship. and i hope you could reserve us some slots for the completion ^___^


dear Dean Linell,

i just wish that our stool exam results will extend its validity from 3 months to 4-6 months. watdyathink? ;)



dear sir tambis,

please lower your toxicity level. di ka naman CI, eh... hehehe... seriously ;)


dear 4th year, 2nd sem of A.Y. 2009-2010

may this sem be a good one...


dear graduating students-- BATCH 2010

KUDOS! we made it this far. and hopefully we can march the aisle soon.




xo,
doby

currently hating you...

click it

because...

...you knew her before i came
...you hurt me again
...you made her picture your display image in YM
...you lied
...you're an example of a private media who showed what a girl should be

>:(

kinsay DEFENSIVE?!

"watch your mouth, honey. you don't know what you mean..."

what is so defensive about admitting my own fault because im being irresponsible. when i'm telling the truth, is it defensive? i thought being defensive is like " devoted to resisting or preventing aggression or attack"(http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/defensive). i just thought recently, do you even know what defensive means? perhaps, NO!

i am defenseless. i am honest enough not to become so "defensive". and who are you to say that to me when you are the one who's being so defensive.

scene 1: at the locker...

you: "na unsa diay ka, dob?" (with your sarcastic, as-if-you're-concerned voice)
me: (in a very low, almost quiet, whispered voice) nabilin nako akong cap and mask :c
you: (in an uber loud voice that echoed almost throughout the OR) AI! NABILIN DIAY IMONG CAP AND MASK?! (still having that sarcastic voice)
me: unsa man ka?! mao nang dili k ganahan sa imo kay di li ka mapagkatiwalaan!
you: "aw!" (again, in a loud pitched tone) "nabilin jud diay imong cap and mask?"
me: bwisit ka man. nigara pud ka! ingnag ayawg saba, kusgon pod ang tingog. ever, dili jud tika mapagkatiwalaan samot na sa mga secrets! (walk out!)

scene 2: students' lounge...

you: unsaon man na nimo? naa bya si Ma'am A. basi masakpan ka. (sarcasm noted)
me: (with my disposable cap and mask) sige lang, naingnan na man pud nako si Sir A. kabalo na siya. gihatagan na gani ko niya ani [pointing to my cap].
you: unya kung si Ma'am A. ang makakita sa imo?
me: sige lang. hulaton ko lang na masakpan ko niya.
you: (with that pleading tone) sige lang, masakpan lang japon ka (and your face is uber evil!)
me: (with dignified voice ^^) bahala nag masakpan ko ni Mam, basta siya ang nakakita sa ako. kesa naman nang masakpan ko kay tungod sa mga estudyanteng sigeg tabi, skandalosa.
you: NGANONG DEFENSIVE MAN KAAYO KA?!
me: (controlling my temper with what she just said) i'm not being defensive. honest lang ko. dili defensive ang tawag ana. (while walking out) ...basa-basa pud ug dictionary ui!

sharing these with my friends, they are just laughing. they never expected that she could utter such word not even knowing what it means or why she's saying it.

we used to be in the same group but there's no spirit within it. it's so lame that your groupmate would plead "masakpan lang japon ka!" i don't know if i deserve to be in this group or she should be exiting this kind of manner and make me feel like i'm [art of the group. nagsalig siguro siya na kagrupo sila dati sa akong mga kagrupo karon, she would act superior like she's the boss. that's a BIG NO-NO to me. she can talk and yell if she wants to, but i would never allow her to say such things to me when she's describing herself.

honey, you're soooo boorish!!

**i wanted to post this thought after our OR duty but i just can't get hold of our computer :C

curse you!!!

i curse all the computer viruses in the world that has done NO GOOD in our computers. bullshit!!!

after the hugs and kisses...

we fought...

and i chased after him...


then eventually made-up...

yet i'm uncertain...as always...

she's coming clean

"no matter how virgin her moves are, she remains what she always is"

she is such a bitch. i loathe her for now. well, i always do but she's my friend and i also care for her. i sometimes get bossy... err, most of the time, i mean. that may be the reason why we don't get along sometimes. i just hate how her narrow mind thinks. laughs at the most senseless stuff. let's say his crush went inside the CR, she laughs. how pathetic.

bitch, can you just get hold of yourself. you come to us to seek for help and you don't listen. no doubt why others sometimes make fun of you, including me (^.^). you don't know what you're doing nor thinking. it would always be useless if you won't listen to our opinions. it would help you though.

but as of now, i loathe
loathing,loathing,loathing,loathing,loathing,loathing,loathing,loathing......

ssshhhh. hilom na!

"just shut up and..."

i love arguments but i just get sick fighting my right to whatever i feel. it's like i don't have the right to feel any angst against my boo. he's just pissing the hell out of me. i don't know why small fights just keep getting bigger when the two of us does not talk anyway. i just shut myself up and keep it all in me and probably say "yeah, whatever". it hurts me when we argue. it seems to me to be like our last fight and then... gone. i fear that.

is there something wrong when i ask him to go inside the campus and go straight to our office to meet me? none of i could think of. then why can't he just do it?! he's mad at me because i didn't go out when he asked me. i already informed him that i had lots of things to do here, so why don't he just come over here? the next thing i knew he's on his way home. and he did not wait for me! it just pissed me off! i'm always pissed off almost everyday. and it's all because of him!

HONESTLY, I'M MAD RIGHT NOW! and crying...

i don't want this fight would lead us to something undesirable. it would be best if he could just apologize to me. it's his fault after all. that 's' word is not harmful for him to say.

LAGOT!

"it really pisses me off!"

after a long time of waiting, he texted me. what pissed me is that he didn't even said 'hi'! damn it! i missed him and i'm so dying to see him and he just texted me "di ako makapunta kc gwa pa kmi manu". the hell i care about your manu! i also cared about our epidemiology and still i bothered thinking about him. why can't he just do the same way. or even thought, "kmusta na kya mine ko?" i don't tend to be demanding but i thought it's already rude of him to reply all my I miss you's and i love you's with a text like that.

i loathe him for now!!!

The Fraud and Prejudice

be careful with what you're looking for, because beauty isn't
everything

Looking at someone of the same sex, examining her perfect bods, makes her almost perfect. She has the long strands of almond brown hair, slender curves on her waist, her height is just enough to be shorter than her boyfriend, her smiles are sweet, fair skin, and she dresses appropriately. Albeit her almost outstanding looks, I didn't bother to describe her eyes.

I can't say she has beautiful pair of eyes nor has the ugly ones. It's typical: no sparkling effects, no clarity, it's vague and no sincerity. Yes, you can read one's sincerity through their eyes. Hers, none.

Well, she's just one of the deceitful fraud in town. No, she's not involved in any scheme like those criminals used to. She is a criminal in other definition- my definition. It means someone who is trying to be perfect when she's not; pretending to be the best when there's always above her; being so omniscient when she doesn't even know who is Paris Hilton (ged!-.-); insensitive and tends to believe she's watching the TV--alone!; grabs any kind of remote control and say she's the queen of all remote controls (DAMN HER, I say, hehe); invades and reads other's text messages in Inbox and Sent Items, wants all decisions should be coming from her, someone who is so selfish and closed-minded... AND SHE IS SOMEONE I HATE! She is my brand of criminal.

i don't want to be a nasty prejudice (and this post doesn't make me any nastier at all). I'm sorry but just became one. Let's take for example, her smiles are sweet but when you taste it-- damn, it's more bitter than bittersweet. She tends to be friendly only to catch her savoring her time reading all the I LOVE YOU's and I MISS YOU's you and boyfriend sent to each other. She asks for your opinion only to be disapproved by her ridiculous ideas. She said she's hungry, but when you offer your food, she's as grumpy as a leprechaun. She's been volunteering to do the rest of the work only to hear her complains about what she has done by tomorrow (girl, thanks for the good deed but we can help you anyway if you only asked).Ugh! She was invited to a party only regretting why she hasn't attended it. She's appears to be shy to answer where in fact she wants the spotlight. She tries to get her balance on her emotions but she stumbles over her words.

Pathetic! But I don't think she's a loser. It is because she's not giving up to be someone ideal for everybody. I mean EVERYBODY. I'm not ideal and I strived to be one but not on a way like hers. I am selfish but I'm learning to give. I don't tend to be Miss-Know-It-All whenever I know something. I don't invade private spaces. And I don't wanna be like her.

I may not be as intelligent and as pretty as her, I think I'm far more graceful than what she is.